Reader Views

3 Off the Tee: Make It Happen: A Healthy, Competitive Approach to Achieving Personal Success

Article first published as Book Review: 3 Off the Tee: Make It Happen: A Healthy, Competitive Approach to Achieving Personal Success by Lorii Myers on Blogcritics.
 
Okay, let me admit immediately that I am not a golfer and that I know precious little about the game of golf. And no, I did not find the cover of the book appealing at all, quite to the contrary. Yet I got quickly immersed in the book, and very soon nearly forgot my complete ignorance of any and all rules related to golf. Which is for sure a testament to how convincing and appealing Lorii Myers’ writing is, and how well she delivers her message in “3 Off the Tee: Make It Happen.”
 
After having finished the book I can recognize that golf was actually a good analogy to life – both should be played in a competitive, but highly organized, strategized, and smart ways if one desires to achieve real success. And yes, if one learns the rules well, truly understands them, applies them in correct ways, and practices enough, then winning should be the logical result of such preparations.

I found the book and its message intelligent, compelling, and oddly relatable. The positive approach is always a winner for me, and Ms. Myers delivers plenty of positive. Yet she also stays very realistic. In fact, one of my favorite passages deals exactly with that:
 
“Expectations: We also need to have expectations of ourselves, imposed on us by ourselves as well as by others. Over time, they help us to find our inspiration, motivation, and focus. Of course, it’s important that expectations are realistic. The realization of realistic expectations and dreams drives us towards success.”
 
While I still don’t think I’ll ever become a golfer, I found plenty to make me think and rethink in this witty gem of a book. “3 Off the Tee: Make It Happen” by Lorii Myers is a book I would recommend to anybody who wants to read a well written self-help book, and if that person happens to be a golfer, this could actually be just the present you were trying to find for them.


3 Off the Tee: Make It Happen: A Healthy, Competitive Approach to Achieving Personal Success
Lorii Myers
Leda Publishing Corporation (2012)
ISBN 9780986790034 Reviewed by Olivera Baumgartner-Jackson for Reader Views (12/12)

Defining Moments: Breaking Through Tough Times

Article first published as Book Review: Defining Moments: Breaking Through Tough Times by Dorothea S. McArthur, PhD, ABPP on Blogcritics.
 
I have long believed that people, as well as books, come into your life for a reason. There were so many times when I was facing an issue, and by merely picking up a book I found exactly the right answer to my dilemma right there. So I really should not be surprised that “Defining Moments: Breaking Through Tough Times” by Dorothea S. McArthur, PhD, ABPP was one of those life changing books for me, Yet thinking back I would be hard pressed to think of another instance of such completely clear and direct answer to the question I’ve been posing myself.
 
This wonderful book carries an apt subtitle of “Breaking Through Tough Times,” and in its sixty-six chapters Dr. McArthur addresses an incredibly wide variety of issues, from more or less complex personal struggles to truly large societal issues which impact all of us. I was mesmerized by her writing from the very first page, and incredibly enough the story that touched me by far the most was the very first one. I sat spellbound for a very, very long time after finishing those powerful three pages, and felt so incredibly empowered. Sometimes it takes so very little to change the course of one's life, and I believe Dr. McArthur's writing has the power to change many lives.

Her approach to issues is very down to earth and very practical, and while she points out a way for an individual to try and obtain counseling even if they think they would not be able to afford it, I believe that the book alone would help many of us handle our individual struggles better and become much happier after doing so. You can pick and choose the stories, or read them in order. Both approaches would work well in my opinion, but I would encourage you to read them all, even the ones that you might think you would or could not relate to. If my experience is anything to go by, you might end up truly surprised. Relevant, current, and enlightening, “Defining Moments: Breaking Through Tough Times” by Dorothea S. McArthur, PhD, ABPP, is a self-help book that I would recommend without reservations.


Defining Moments: Breaking Through Tough Times
Dorothea S. McArthur, PhD, ABPP
Cove Press (2012)
ISBN 9780984773510
Reviewed by Olivera Baumgartner-Jackson for Reader Views (11/12)

Alpha Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power

Article first published as Book Review: Alpha Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power by Mal Duane on Blogcritics. 
 
Mal Duane’s story of overcoming life adversities and emerging victorious is certainly an inspiring one, and doubtless would be a good fit for many readers struggling with addiction, low self-esteem, and self-destructive relationships. Her story, which takes up most of the book, “Alpha Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power,” really illustrates how it’s possible to move from being down, depressed, and feeling helpless to being the one in charge and fully empowered.

While I found her life story interesting, I had a hard time connecting, or finding anything to really relate to. We all tend to live our lives by our own rules, and the way Ms. Duane chose to live hers well into her 40s was completely foreign to me. I did, however, greatly appreciate her honesty and openness. It must be horribly difficult to show the world the lows of one’s life, and not sound melodramatic while doing this. I think Ms. Duane accomplished that very well.

Part Two of “Alpha Chick” deals with the practical implementation of Ms. Duane’s plan of “stepping into faith” and becoming an Alpha Chick, a term that I really did not care for much. True, it is catchy, and probably meant to be empowering, but a chick in either sense of the word is not what I would like to be seen as – ever. Her plan is simple, straightforward, and actually makes a lot of sense. It consists of five steps, and the names of those five steps actually spell out the word “faith” They are:
 
Focus
 Acceptance and Attitude
 Identification and Intention
 Thoughts
 Healing and Helping

It should not take you very long to read this second part of the book and decide if this is the path you want to follow. Additionally the author included a very comprehensive list of resources, which she calls the Library of Love, and which I found extremely interesting. Self-help books are always a very personal choice, so I would advise anybody in need of such help to take a look at Mal Duane’s “Alpha Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power.” It just might be the book you’ve been looking for.


Alpha Chick: Five Steps for Moving from Pain to Power
Mal Duane
Alpha Chick Press (2011)
ISBN 9780983412908
Reviewed by Olivera Baumgartner-Jackson for Reader Views (11/12)

The Upside of Down Times: Discovering the Power of Gratitude

Article first published as Book Review: The Upside of Down Times: Discovering the Power of Gratitude by Lisa Ryan on Blogcritics.

I have to say that “The Upside of Down Times: Discovering the Power of Gratitude” by Lisa Ryan is just what I needed. In my own personal journey, it has been suggested that I work on my being grateful for what I have. It is a struggle at times to remember that when it seems everything is going wrong, it’s not really everything.
 
This workbook has really good exercises that forces you to dig deep to find the good. In most cases it’s not really that hard; it’s really about if you want to recognize it. Looking at things from a positive perspective is not something I do easily or even very often.

The first exercise follows a short story about a trip to a restaurant where Lisa had experienced exceptional service. She asked for the general manager’s business card and sent a note about the server. The next time she came in, he remembered her and had written her a poem of gratitude and how her small note touched his life in a huge way. The exercise says to write to or about someone who has provided excellent service to you. This one I had to skip because I haven’t been out much. I will do this the very next time I have a great experience.

Lisa goes on to say “Gratitude is in the details.” and “gratitude is not a now-and-then thing.” Boy is that true! It takes practice to make it a part of your everyday life. Something I have not ever done in mine. No wonder I haven’t had much positive reactions to life.
 
Another exercise is to go about your day and make a point to bring a smile to someone’s face and log what you have learned from the experience. This is just another from the introduction part of the book. This book is filled with great ways to reflect on yourself and remember the good in the life you have, even when everything is not at its best. I believe this is a great tool for me.  I can imagine this would be great for someone in the process of recovery, and I mean recovery of all types - mine is co-dependency so I am working on making my life more enjoyable and setting the past free.
“The Upside of Down Times: Discovering the Power of Gratitude” by Lisa Ryan is a workbook I will work over and over, so I chose not to write in the book but rather in a notebook so I can do this over and over. This is part of my new self-loving program and I will even purchase copies for my friends that have similar struggles!


The Upside of Down Times: Discovering the Power of Gratitude
Lisa Ryan
Outskirts Press (2012)
ISBN 9781432790554
Reviewed by Jennifer Hass for Reader Views (10/12)

Give Yourself Permission to Shine: Through Faith I Found Love

Article first published as Book Review: Give Yourself Permission to Shine: Through Faith I Found Love by Grace King on Blogcritics.

“Give Yourself Permission to Shine” - isn’t that the hardest thing to do sometimes?! That is a lesson I am currently learning. Everyone deserves to be happy. We are all unique and special. Our trials and tribulations might be different from others but they still affect us the same. We beat ourselves up over things from the past, taking on guilt for other people’s actions and never feeling good enough. We pretend to be fine when on the inside we are falling apart. “Give Yourself Permission to Shine: Through Faith I Found Love” is Grace King’s story. What a touching read. Growing up with a loving mother who happens to be a single parent, Grace had all the love any kid could ask for, yet the absence of her father contributed to a clear path for self-destruction.
 
As many of us might know (some all too well), we pretend that things like rejection (from our parents) don’t really bother us because we are “strong” and capable and we don’t need them. Then over the years things stack up and before we realize it, we are out of control. Grace had an eating disorder that affects many people of all ages and races, I am assuming mostly women.

As Grace reflects on her past, she comes to realize that her past had much more of an effect on her than she ever imagined. Now facing a struggle with herself and being bulimic, she tells her very honest story of her life with this condition. This mental illness can destroy you like any other addiction. When she wasn’t hooked on drugs she was completely powerless over her illness and wanted help. But it wasn’t until she really accepted the truth and began being honest about it did she have success.
 
I have to say that the end of the book surprised me as she was so honest about everything. I know that the hardest part of putting on a brave front is telling lies to everyone around you….feeling lonely, deceitful and unmanageable. Chapter 25 seemed to be added in after the book was written and it came as a complete surprise. Just goes to show how human this dear woman is!
 
This book is an inspiration. It was therapy for Grace to write the book and therapy for me to read it as my own struggle is not with bulimia, it is very close in nature. I was touched by her strength to write the truth. It must have taken so much courage to tell all the things that she once tried so hard to hide. After finding her faith in God, it made it easier for her to help herself and to learn to love herself again.

I more than enjoyed “Give Yourself Permission to Shine: Through Faith I Found Love” by Grace King and will surely reference Chapter 24 for many years to come in hopes of fully learning how to forgive myself and give myself permission to shine!


Give Yourself Permission to Shine: Through Faith I Found Love
Grace King
Balboa Press (2012)
ISBN 9781452548685
Reviewed by Jennifer Hass for Reader Views (10/12)

Sacred Transitions: Taking a More Conscious Role with Dying

Article first published as Book Review: Sacred Transitions: Taking a More Conscious Role with Dying by Julie M. Milne, PhD on Blogcritics.

The author of “Sacred Transitions: Taking a More Conscious Role with Dying,” Julie M. Milne, PhD, has a wealth of credentials that involve psychotherapy, metaphysical practices, and working with those that are preparing to transition.  When her own mother began to decline, Dr. Milne put these practices to work on both herself and her mother.  Instead of feeding into the despair of the impending loss of a cherished mother, she set out to create a beautiful environment in which she could transition peacefully.  She also continued to practice her energy work and therapy on herself.  I admire her for doing this because in doing so she created a lovely environment for both her mom and those around her.  Losing a parent is a difficult experience.  It is a time where it is easy to let yourself go and eventually fall apart. By adhering to her principles Dr. Milne gained a stronger sense of her own self and thereby was able to fully appreciate the beauty of her mother’s soul as it prepared to pass.
          
Dr. Milne made a deathbed promise to her dad that she would take care of her mom. She honored this promise. Many times it was extremely challenging to do so, especially when she had to deal with incompetent or uncaring medical staff. On the other hand, she had a great deal of support from her family, and from a wonderful hospice staff.  Having these people in her life helped to ease the burden.
 
“Sacred Transitions” is divided into two sections.  The first part is titled, “The Journey into Death as Rebirth.” In this section, Dr. Milne takes us through the experience of preparing for her mother to transition.  This involves the loss of her mother’s health and her placement into assisted living.  As she further declines she continues to need more and more assistive care.   Watching her mother decline both physically and mentally challenged Dr. Milne to do everything she could in her power to try to help her maintain her faith and her dignity.  This involved advocating strongly for her care, praying with her, and doing her metaphysical work.
 
When she finally does transition, the experience is incredibly powerful and beautiful.  I also felt that Dr. Milne was left with no feelings of regret because she did everything she could for her. In this time, she also experienced her own healing in areas of forgiveness.  Being able to forgive and move on opens up doors for more powerful healing experiences to occur.

The second part of the book is titled, “A Handbook for Family, Friends and Caregivers.” This section offers a wealth of resources to help the people involved with those who are dying.  The Bibliography in the back of the book is also an excellent source for resource information.

 I felt that these two sections create a perfect resource for the caregivers and loved ones of those who are preparing to go.  By making the experience as peaceful and as positive as possible, not only will the caregiver feel relief, but they will also not have any regrets that they didn’t do enough.

 Personally, I have lost a tremendous number of people that I know recently, in a short period of time.  It has hit me very hard.  I also spent the past year helping care for my boyfriend’s mother as she started letting go.  Caring for her was very difficult because she did not want any help or medical intervention.  When she finally passed, we were with her, and it was very peaceful.  I wish I had read this book sooner so that I could have put many of the practices discussed into place. On the other hand, when we were in the ER with her, I did do some energy work and saw something beautiful happen that made my faith unshakeable.  I can’t go back and try to do better; however, I can move on with my life and keep in mind that there is a lot to do for helping loved ones take on a conscious role in the process of transitioning.  I can also focus on improving the quality of my own life, and getting back on track spiritually.  In doing so, my life will become more beautiful and meaningful, and within myself I will feel more complete.  By doing this, I will be prepared for when my time comes. 
           
I highly, highly recommend “Sacred Transitions: Taking a More Conscious Role with Dying” by Julie M. Milne, PhD, to loved ones, caregivers and the terminally ill person.  If everyone reads it and knows what to expect, it will be easier to put the practices to use.


Sacred Transitions: Taking a More Conscious Role with Dying
Julie M. Milne, PhD
Outskirts Press (2012)
ISBN 9781432795054
Reviewed by Paige Lovitt for Reader Views (10/12)

Making Sense When Life Doesn’t: The Secrets of Thriving in Tough Times

Article first published as Book Review: Making Sense When Life Doesn’t: The Secrets of Thriving in Tough Times by Cecil Murphey on Blogcritics.
 
I picked out “Making Sense When Life Doesn’t” by Cecil Murphey to review based on my own personal struggles. I am learning to look at life a different way. Chapter after chapter of this book stories told are stories of my life. Even though the struggle may not the same, it’s still a personal struggle. When a man of God can go through all the things that Cecil went through and still have faith that makes it a little more believable for me.
 
Looking at the table of contents, each chapter title says exactly what I need to hear. It flows perfectly. As I work on myself and reconfigure my brain to think about my past as lessons that needed to be learned, it makes it easier for me to read this book and understand that whatever has happened only happened for that little while and then I made it through. Somewhere along the lines I lost my faith and learning to get it back is something I struggle with every day.
Reassurance lay in the pages written by a complete stranger. Cecil Murphey knows struggle. There are so many wonderful quotes I have shared on my Facebook page. I am not sure which one is my favorite but I have to say that one of them would have to be this:

“My hurting friends don’t need my advice; they need my compassion.”

In my own personal experience, I just felt as if life was against me. Why were these bad things always happening to me? Why me? Poor me. Why is it that when there is a problem, someone always chimes in something to the effect of “well someone has it worse. Just be thankful your not homeless or being beat by your spouse” kind of thing. That is exactly what I don’t want to hear. Remembering that in my co-dependence that I need to mind the same rule and be aware that MY hurting friends don’t need my advice either! Sometimes we just need to be hugged or just know someone cares. We all know that someone else can’t always help or save us.
What a down-to-earth writer! Had he not mentioned he used to be a preacher I would not have known it. Isn’t it nice to be able to read and feel God and it not be preachy. Mr. Murphey says
 throughout the book that he was not sure that he wanted to be a preacher for the rest of his life and that although he was great at it, it did not fulfill him.

I was inspired by these words I have read. Not just in my own faith in God but my faith in my own self. Knowing I can do exactly what I want to do with my life and not worry about how it suits everyone else. Staying true to your self is one of the many messages in this book.

 I cannot express how much “Making Sense When Life Doesn’t” has touched my life and I will be seeking out further titles from Cecil Murphey. His writing is simple, honest and down right to the point. Even if it’s not the point you want to hear.


Making Sense When Life Doesn’t: The Secrets of Thriving in Tough Times
Cecil Murphey
Summerside Press (2012)
ISBN 9781609362249
Reviewed by Jennifer Hass for Reader Views (10/12)

Welcome to Wynott: Rethinking the Way We’ve Always Done Things

Wynott is a fictional city that serves as the blueprint for an ideal community. Created by author Ray Harris, Wynott is the epitome of making positive changes by working with the available assets to “improve the quality of life in measurable ways.” In “Welcome to Wynott,” he stresses the importance of running a city in a way that makes sense instead of just doing things the way they have always been done. Harris provides a history of how flourishing cities began failing as people left for the suburbs in search of the American dream of owning a house with a yard. He also demonstrates how the infrastructure and public transportation system were affected.
 
The greatest asset of Wynott is its residents. It is comprised of a mixture of age groups, socioeconomic classes, and household types. Everyone is important and expected to contribute. Older citizens are respected and volunteer their time and skills to further improve the city. The people function as a community and support each other. There is no campaigning for political positions. Rather, leaders are chosen and have limited terms so there is always a turnover of power and an infusion of fresh ideas.
 
Another important aspect of Wynott is its layout. It has small stores owned by its people. Everything is within walking or biking distance so people are not reliant on cars which crowd the roads and create pollution. There is a system of community currency that people earn for volunteering and can spend for local services. This helps support local businesses and keeps the city thriving.
 
“Welcome to Wynott: Rethinking the Way We’ve Always Done Things” by Ray Harris with Lily Coyle is a good resource for anyone who is interested in learning about ways to improve what already exists instead of abandoning structures and building further away from the hub of the city. Many of the author’s arguments are common sense so it is baffling as to why the country is so resistant to make the changes. The author uses humor and colorful illustrations to make his point that “a city, by nature, brings people together and a suburb, by design, pushes them apart.” The only people who would possibly object to trying this method are career politicians who would no longer have the status or power they crave.


Welcome to Wynott: Rethinking the Way We’ve Always Done Things
Ray Harris with Lily Coyle
Beaver’s Pond Press (2012)
ISBN 9781592984947
Reviewed by Leslie Granier for Reader Views (8/12)

Surviving Mental Illness: My Story

Article first published as Book Review: Surviving Mental Illness: My Story by Linda Naomi Katz on Blogcritics.
 
Author Linda Naomi Katz has written an excellent book on mental illness, specifically mood disorders. “Surviving Mental Illness: My Story” is easy to read and understand.
 
At the beginning, she talks about three specific mood disorders and the symptoms and possible treatment for these disorders. In addition, she gives resources for those who are suffering from mental illness with information on jobs, housing and transportation. Ms. Katz provides this information in a supportive, empathetic writing style.
 
The next chapter discusses her family’s history of mental illness and how it impacted her and those around her. Her mother was diagnosed with depression, although the author does state that she felt her mom had bipolar disorder, or schizophrenia, based on the types of medication she was taking.
 
The remaining chapters take us on the author’s own journey of being diagnosed with bipolar disorder explaining how she dealt with this chaotic life. During this time she relates many of the issues she had to deal with such as lack of relationships; low self esteem; suicidal thoughts and the death of her parents.
 
One of the wonderful things the author did was to remain positive throughout her writing so that readers would know that these disorders can be treated and a person can live a fulfilling life. She also provided many resources for readers who wish to seek additional information and support.
 
“Surviving Mental Illness: My Story” by Linda Naomi Katz would be an excellent book for anyone who has a loved one or friend diagnosed with mental illness. In addition, it would be a great book for therapists to recommend to their clients.


Surviving Mental Illness: My Story
Linda Naomi Katz
Outskirts Press (2012)
ISBN 9781432783990
Reviewed by Carol Hoyer, PhD, for Reader Views (8/12)

Life Chapters: Extraordinary Afterlives of People You Never Heard of (Book II, Death Walker Series)

Article first published as Book Review: Life Chapters: Extraordinary Afterlives of People You Never Heard of (Book II, Death Walker Series) by Galen Stoller on Blogcritics.
 
Following “My Life after Life,” “Life Chapters” is the second book in the Death Walker series.  Written by Galen Stoller, who died at 16 years of age, the book is edited by his father Dr. K Paul Stoller who continues to be able to communicate with his son through a medium.  Galen Stoller did a lot of living and had a great deal of accomplishments prior to passing on at a young age. While people would see his death as a tragic waste of a young life, his continued contact with his father has allowed Galen to continue on making a difference for those of us who seek to better our lives.  This book is a beautiful tribute to a wonderful young man.

“Life Chapters” talks about individuals that Galen has connected with on the other side. Each has their own special story, and by telling it, Galen imparts information to us, so that we can learn about the other side, and how important it is that we live meaningful, enriching lives now.  By focusing on how we live in this dimension, and how we open our minds up to believing that we will continue on after we pass, we can help control the direction we go when we transition.  If our beliefs are limited now, we will be responsible for keeping ourselves from growing and learning when we pass. The people that Galen talks about, who have gone on, are having varied experiences, mainly because of what they believed while they were alive. 

For some people, who are stuck in the notion of heaven and hell, they will not be comfortable with what they will learn while reading this.  For me, I felt like what I read made a lot of sense.   It helped me find a lot of answers to questions that I had about what happens to people who come from different belief systems when they pass.  I also feel that people who are more open minded to there being a beautiful existence on the other side, will find comfort in knowing that it is infinite.  This made me feel better for both myself and those that I love that have transitioned. I recommend “Life Chapters” by Galen Stoller for both those who are seeking to better their lives now, and those who have lost loved ones and need reassurance that they moved on to something greater.


Life Chapters: Extraordinary Afterlives of People You Never Heard of (Book II, Death Walker Series)
Galen Stoller
Dream Treader Press (2012)
ISBN 9780983242529
Reviewed by Paige Lovitt for Reader Views (7/12)